If you're gearing up to have anal sex for the first time, you've probably got some questions. Chief among them: Is anal sex poop a real thing?
Ready for it?...Yep, it might happen. But before you freak out, rest assured that there are things you can do make it less of a, well, messy affair...and something you really enjoy.
Why you might poop during anal sex
First, lets get real about what anal sex is: A penis or sex toy is going up your butt, so the fear that you might poop is common and normal.
It's also worth getting into a bit of an anatomy lesson: The colon processes waste, then sends it through the rectum, which then exits the body through the anus. If you don't actually feel like you need to poop, there shouldn't be a huge issue here, but it's still possible your partner will encounter some fecal matter with deep penetration. I mean, that's the game you're playing when you're embarking on this journey, and there's always the likelihood of a little leakage.
If there's stool in the rectum, and there is stimulation to the rectum, it will increase the chance of having a bowel movement, says Lauren Streicher, MD, medical director of the Northwestern Medicine Center for Sexual Medicine and Menopause .
But this is also why anal sex can be pleasurable it gets your pelvic floor stimulated and contracting, which in turn will get you to poop, she adds. If there's poop there, there's a chance it'll make its way out.
What's more, weak anal sphincter muscles, which control your bowel movements, may make you more likely to leak during backdoor play, explains Alayne Markland, DO, an associate professor at the University of Alabama Medicine. (More on that in a bit.)
Okay, Id still like to prevent it from happening. Tell me how.
If you remember one anal sex mantra, let it be this: Make sure you're not due to poo, says sexologist Juliet Allen , M.A. You dont want a full bowel, so try to empty the pipes beforehand. And, she adds, if you know you might have anal later, dont eat foods that will go through you, since it may increase your chances of pooping during anal , like spicy, fatty stuff (definitely dont order the chili fries!). Some people will try enemas to clean things out, and this is generally safe when used on occasion, says Dr. Streicher.
You can also try shallower penetration to reduce the risk. And if your partner naturally has a penis with a large corona [head of the penis], be prepared that its more likely to, um, take poop out with it. If you're new to anal sex, start slow and gradually. There's no need to go as deep as possible on the first try if you're not comfortable with it!
Plus, if you're concerned about the aforementioned weak sphincter issue, doing Kegels regularly can help strengthen those muscles. And yes, I'm talkin' about butt Kegels. Who knew?!
But why does it still feel like I'm going to sh*t myself?
Allen explains that you'll probably feel like its happening anyway. Being penetrated causes the muscle there to move in the same way as it does during a BM.
So even if there's nothing in there, you'll still get that sensation without anything coming out, verifies Dr. Streicher. Your best bet is just to try to relax and enjoy the moment.
Yikes, it happened. Now what do I do?
Truth is, you have to be prepared to tap into your inner shruggy emoji. The reality is, when we choose to have anal sex, we choose to put something up our bum, which is where poo comes from," says Allen. "So its a risk we take." (Simply put, but so, so true.) If you leak (or more) and you feel embarrassed, remind yourself that sex can be a messy affair. Hop in the shower together to wash off, and you'll hardly notice.
Importantly, dont let the chance of poop scare you away from trying anal sex if you're otherwise interested. You shouldn't be afraid to try sexual practices that you enjoy, says Markland. Keep in mind, its also about who you do it with: Choose amazing partners/lovers to have sex with," says Allen. "And then you'll be with someone who won't make it a big deal." That's just good advice in general, no?
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